Father's Day

Father's Day always brings so many thoughts and feelings into my head. I have so much to be thankful for when it comes to Fathers/Fatherhood. Anyone who knows me well can tell, I am far from perfect. One thing I believe I am very aware of is a knowledge that all good things come from a loving Heavenly Father. Some of the trials and things come from our Heavenly Father as well, but that is only to bring about the good inside of us. I am thankful that he knows me so well and knows what is best for me. He gives me everything I need and yet does not give me the things which are not for my good.

I have the most wonderful earthly Father in the world. If that seems like a bold statement, it is. It is also true. My Dad is my hero. He is a beacon of strength in every situation. I know he is not perfect, yet he is as close as anyone I know personally. Being around someone as a son is around their Dad would cause more and more imperfections to shine through. While he may have slight, tiny flaws, he is the most true man I know. He never seems to have to struggle with what is right or wrong, that almost pefect knowledge seems to have been embedded within him at birth. He is successful, wise, strong, talented, and gifted. However, more importantly, he is a spiritual giant among men. He is gentle and kind to all, even when someone has treated him poorly or taken advantage of him. He seems to have the attitude, that someone can only be taking advantage of you, if YOU let yourself think they're taking advantage of you. He has the patience of Job. He is soft-spoken, hilarious, and there for anyone. He has a way of seeing others needs before they do. He sees a need and fills it before anyone around him knows what is going on. He definitely has served in many public ways, yet I am constantly amazed with how much he serves and all he gives when he thinks no one is looking. There has not been a food drive that has ever gone by where my parents didn't load up the back of the car at Costco to donate to it. I have heard multiple people comment that he was their favorite home teacher. I have never heard anyone speak ill of him, and I cannot imagine anyone truthfully being able to. Truly, the more I am around him, the more perfect that I see he is. Most people's imperfections tend to show through the more someone is around them. He is just the opposite. He could never possibly know how much I love, respect, and revere him.

I love being a Daddy. The word Daddy (and Dadd-o) seems so childish in some ways, but it has become the sweetest word in the world to me over the last 5 1/2 years. I love my children more than I can express in words. Once again, what an incredible blessing given to me by my loving Father in Heaven. My kids mean the world to me. I want to be there for them in every way. I loved this Father's Day and the time I spent with them. While I loved all the shirts and gifts that my family helped the kids buy, nothing compared to a Father's Day hug and hearing my kids sweet voices sing songs to me at church. McQueen and Tinkerbell have changed my life in more ways than I could have ever imagined. They continually make positive, everlasting, impacts upon me. I can easily recognize their imperfections, tantrums, etc. Although I seek to teach them correctly, I love them for who they are. I do not ever look at a beautiful glass sculpture, and think, "yeah, but it is only made of sand!" Likewise, with my kids, I see all that is beautiful, wonderful, and amazing within them. I love them completely for everything their little minds, spirits, and bodies possess. I want to strive to be better, to live better, and to act better because I am their Dad. I want them to know more than anything else of my love for them. I want them to learn, to enjoy life, and especially, to laugh. Not a day goes by where I don't express my thanks for the blessing of being a Father to these two sweet spirits, given to me by a loving Father above.

Mother's Day

Mother's Day always causes me to reflect and be thankful. I am thankful to my own Mother. I am also thankful for Tinkerbell and McQueen's Mom for bringing the kids to this world. I also am thankful for the dream of a sweet, wonderful, woman who I can hope to one day be married to and have more children with.

I would be very ungrateful if I didin't express my thankfulness for my great Mother. My Mother is an amazing woman who I am so very grateful for. She has always had a quiet, charitable nature to her. She has never worried about winning any popularity contests, and has in fact steered about as far from the lime-light as possible. Despite all of this, she serves, cares, and is there for each of us. She will quietly do anything anyone asks, yet she flies under the radar all the while. Hers is a life of quiet, kind, service. Even after giving so much from her heart, she never values any possession of hers too much to share. She has never been one to choose the popularity of the world, or even the popularity of her children, in pursuit of what she believes is right. Because of this, she has definitely won the popularity of her children and grandchildren. I am thankful for her love which is everlasting and true. She constantly encourages and uplifts each of us and indeed those all around her. She is the first to say she is sorry or to admit her faults, all the while being the first to overlook mistakes or faults in others. I am so very grateful for this wonderful woman who has given me so much for 29 years.

I truly admire Mothers everywhere. The love, kindness, compassion, and sweetness woman can possess is absolutely amazing. I think that too often women go through life comparing or thinking of their inadequacies. While no one is perfect, I believe that a Mother who really cares and selflessly serves her family is incredible. Still others we could call Mothers, who are only missing children of their own. They serve all the children they come in contact with. Just like any Mother, they serve with kindness, sweetness, and genuine love. I am so very grateful for the examples of amazing women who care so much for their children that they could only be called Mother. Loving Mothers are such amazing, special people. Their capacity for nurturing, caring, and loving for their children is so great. I hope any Mother who reads this can know of their special nature. It does not matter exactly what activities are done with your children, how clean your home, is or anything else. Being a Mother transcends the judgments (or even perceived judgments) of the world. A Mother needs only worry about doing right by her children and her family. All that matters to a real Mother is that they are important to their children. A child can feel the love of their Mother, and know that they have a special place in her heart. I admire and respect the example and strength of any loving Mother I come in contact with. Mothers have to be the most amazing creation of our Heavenly Father.

The Price of Admission

In this world it seems that so much emphasis is placed on worldly wealth. Even as I compare my generation with my parent's generation, it sickens me. When did we arrive at a place where so many judge the quality of a person based on their worldly assets? That is about the farthest thing from what I have been taught. In the last six months I have had three friends who have lost their jobs, and one couple has just lost their house. My heart and prayers continually go out to each of them in this trying time. I think it is important to remember that circumstances only show WHERE someone is, and not WHO someone is. Circumstances do not account for the soul of a person, the depth of a person, or certainly the potential of a person. Yes, there are some cases where bad circumstances have been self-inflicted. Even in those cases, I believe that people can change and rise up. A person is only a failure if they stay down when they have fallen. One could say that I am only speaking as a person who doesn't have an amazing amount of stuff going for them. To that I would say that I know plenty of people who are a success, on every level, who feel the same way. Fortunately, I know those who are reading this probably feel the same way I do. Circumstances do not define a person, but rather, thoughts, feelings, and actions define each of us. Regardless of your circumstances, I am grateful for all of you my friends and for all that you have given, and continually give me. I wrote the following poem from some of the thoughts that have been on my mind.

I want you to know
what you do for work
doesn’t matter to me
it doesn’t matter if things are tough
or if you have lots of money

You aren’t required to live
in a huge house upon the hill
or go on an exotic vacation
through the mountains of Brazil

It doesn’t matter to me
if you have high levels of education
or if you feel your train has not
quite rolled into the station

The last thing that matters to me
is if you drive a beater
or if you have the means to afford
something a little sweeter

I am not concerned with your debt
or your credit score
or what designer labels I’d find
if I peeked in your clothing drawer

In the price of admission
of my friendship
these things are all for naught
when I look towards the important things
they don’t even deserve a thought

All that I require from those,
who may want to call me “friend”
is an honest try to be your best
to work at this until the end

Just say what you mean
and then mean what you say
help to lift the burdens
of people around you each day

Try not to criticize or judge
those you may happen by
realize that on this earth
“imperfect” is in abundant supply

I do not require perfection
I have flaws without a doubt
while I may slip from time to time
I try to walk the route

If this list does not seem like
a daunting task for you to do
I hope that you would call me “friend”
for I call you one too

Why We Build Temples

I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I sincerely hope that is not a shock to anyone. While I am very imperfect, I believe, and try to live, its teachings. I recently came across this short video posted on the Church's website. The video explains why we build temples. I hope it will serve in helping those who are not of my faith to better understand our beliefs, while stregthening those who believe as I do.

Happy Birthday Kiddos!

For months I had been told that life as I knew it would soon be over. I would only scoff and look with excitement towards the big day. The day finally arrived five years ago today, at around one o’clock in the morning. In a single instant, I knew that what I had been hearing was true. Life as I knew it was over. I contemplated what that meant. At that single moment, I contemplated a lot. Tears began to stream down my face as I wondered and marveled. Time seemed to slow down just as my thoughts began to race. You see, that day forever changed me. It changed my life; it changed who I am, what I am, and caused me to once again evaluate what is important. I was now a Daddy to two sweet little twins sent straight from a loving Father above. Perhaps, a person who has never had a child brought into their life can never experience how you can, in an instant, love another human being so completely. This event did change life as I knew it. Not in the way many had described, but rather, wholly and completely for the better. I remember the birth of each of them so vividly like it was yesterday. As each child was born, tears of happiness seemed to stream faster and faster down my face. I remember going into the ICU to see a team of people working with each child. I remember watching all that they were doing to make my two healthy. I could feel within the depths of myself the distress that they felt. My heart broke as tubes were placed inside of them, wires were attached to them, and the workings of the medical staff surrounded them. Knowing that this was all for their good was the only thing that held me back from taking them, holding them, and comforting them. It would be a long couple of days before I could finally envelope them in my arms for the first time, to let them know that Daddy was here. Not only did I need them to know that I was here, but that I was there all along, and that I will always be there for them. Until then, I could only cry out within the depths of my soul. To this day, my heart still breaks each time they hurt, and it shines each time they are happy. I have an inseparable bond with each of them that can never be broken. Five amazingly fast years later, I have a beautiful, smart little girl, and a rough and tumble, and yet sweet little boy. Not a moment goes by that I do not think of them. They truly are my life. It is still beyond my comprehension that my Heavenly Father would entrust me with two amazing spirits. I feel so incredibly blessed to have the title “Daddy.” I contemplate just what that title means, and the important role I play. Every time I hear their sweet little voices call out to me, it makes my heart swell within me. So yes, life as I knew it, definitely ended. With this death of the old came such an amazing new life. I have lost nothing of value in the transition to this new life, but have only gained on an enormous scale. I gained a purpose far beyond my own. Life once again was no longer just living for myself, but living to love, support, help, teach, feed, and nurture two little people to grow into something great. So with the celebration of the birthday of my two best friends, I have to give thanks for the great blessing they have always been, and continually are, in my life.

TO MY PRINCESS

I do not have the ability to express in words what you mean to me and how much I love you. I remember you always being a Daddy's little girl as a baby. You would often reach for me to hold you, and your favorite sleeping position would often be on my chest. For much of your life you would not calm down unless I sang a song to you in my imperfect voice. You learned the "Daddy's Homecoming" song shortly after being able to talk. You would not only sing it in your sweet voice to me, but you would require it to be played each time you went to sleep at night. Each night before bed you would take my pillow to your bed as your replaced it with your own. I was happy for the exchange as I thought of you as I laid my head to rest upon the Disney Princesses each night. I cannot express how thankful I am that you have allowed me to be so involved. You truly light up a room with your excitement, your creations, and your sweet little spirit. I love your fire and zest for life. I love that you are still, and forever will be, Daddy's little girl. I love when you just want your Daddy to play with you, cuddle you, watch a movie with you, or anything else. I love to hear your sweet voice on the phone and hear all that has happened while I am away from you. I love to watch you dance your little heart out at each recital. Most of all, I love your caring attitude towards others. I love that you want to involve everyone in everything that you do. No one is uninvited when you are around. Thank you for your sweet little example and your love for the Savior. You are a sweet, beautiful, smart little girl. Most of all you are a special daughter of God. Always remember that. I am so thankful I can be there for you and be called your "Dadd-o." I love you Princess.

TO MY BUBBA

There is not enough words in any language to tell you how I feel about you. You are filled with so much life and energy. I love to play and wrestle with you, and I love your happy little disposition. You are one tough, fierce wrestler, but yet you are the sweetest little boy in the world. Your play time is filled with all the toughness of any NFL player, yet your heart is so tender and sweet. I love your constant search for understanding, your ability to comprehend things and the life you bring to every party. I love that you can see humor and have laughter in so many situations. You have always been a happy little boy. Indeed your laughter, smiles, and humor has always been contagious to all around you. You have always wanted to be by my side and share in everything I am doing. You have a fearless little spirit, which surprisingly, has not caused you a lot of injury......so far. I love your competitive little nature and your desire to try new things. I love that you are constantly looking to help others. I love that you cannot wait to experience life. That is a quality so many people either don't have or something they have lost. Never lose that quality. Continue to appreciate all of life's moments while you are in them, even as you look forward for great things in your future. I love that you and I are interested in similar things (especially cars) and can enjoy so much together. I love having my little buddy by my side as I am working on, or doing something. You are my special little buddy, and I love the way you say "I love you too Dad" everytime I tell you I love you. I am so glad I get to be your Dad and have fun with you as I help you to learn and grow. You are such a good little boy. Finally, I can always feel your close connection to our Savior. You have a great knowledge of who you are and where you came from. Once again, never lose that. You are a great son of an almighty God. Thank you for coming into my outstretched arms and accepting me as your Dad. I love you Bubba.

I Missed You

Early this morning, at 4AM, I found myself awake.
My body waking so early, this must be some mistake.

In sounds so faint, I could hear, some movements so discreet,
All the sudden I could clearly hear, the pitter-patter of little feet.

Then someone climbed up into my bed, and kissed and hugged me tight.
She sweetly said, “I love you Daddy, I missed you in my dreams all night.”

My heart burst with love for her, a Daddy’s love so deep.
My princess cuddled up next to me and quickly fell asleep.

In the craziness of this world, things can often become so wild.
All that really matters, is my love and role, as the parent of each child.

My Kids Might be Cocky....

When the kids are told they are smart, they know it’s true.
Someone says they’re good looking, they see it through and through.

If they are told “good job!” they might say “you bet!”
People ask of their abilities, with confident replies they are met.

When you ask if they can do something, they’re never shy.
In most cases their confidence seems, in never-ending supply.

While I want to see confidence, some of this causes me slight alarm.
I worry as they get older, too much of this attitude may lose its charm.

There is one area in which I love their confident reply;
an area in which I never want, a bit of confidence to die.

I tell them “I LOVE YOU,” and no matter what’s happened that day,
“I know, and I love you too Dad,” is the phrase my kids sweetly say.

Time and time again, this phrase melts my heart;
confidence in this area, I must forever work to impart.

Free at Last!

Today I took my finals. This morning I woke up really early and went to the gym to just shoot the basketball before finals. I usually cram like crazy for finals, then the last hour or two right before, I find something fun to do to ease my mind. No matter how poorly I did on my finals, there is no way I could have missed as many questions as I did shots this morning. See, there is a bright side to EVERYTHING! My first final started at 7AM this morning and I was expected to be in finals straight through until about 11:30AM. I ended up completing all of them by 9:40AM. That means that I did really well, or I did really terrible. No matter what, at least I am finally free! Well, at least for a week or two until the next semester starts. I am so excited to have all of this free time though. No more staying up super late to do homework. I can actually workout at the gym some mornings instead of from 11PM-1AM at night! Wait, that technically is the morning, but I digress. My schedule will be awesome and somewhat normal. Then the next semester will start and my body will have to adjust back.......but hey, until then I think it is sweet!

• I was talking to the kids on the phone yesterday. They were being really silly. I said, "you guys are hilarious." A then said, "if we are so funny how come I can't hear you laughing Daddy?" How am I supposed to respond to that? I was really tempted to say the mature thing. You know, "What was that?... bad connection.....crshshshshsh," but I didn't.

Come What May and Love It

"Come what may and love it." This was a sentence repeated often in, and the topic of, the last General Conference address given by Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin. What an amazing man of God he is. I know we are not supposed to have favorite apostles, but if I did, Elder Wirthlin would be one of them. His messages were always so simple and easy to understand. All of his talks that I can remember, just focused on being a good person. I am not a master of the scriptures or deep doctrine. I only know what I believe in my heart and mind and try really hard to live it. Elder Wirthlin never seemed to make anything too complicated. I always felt him speaking directly to my heart. His were always direct, simple messages of hope, of striving to do better, of happiness, and of loving others. In his most recent talk, he spoke about laughing through trials and despair. What a great message for all of us. The message that he delivered previous to this one talked about Christlike service and love for our brothers on this earth. Whenever Elder Wirthlin would speak, I did not have questions about what he said. Everything that came out of his mouth gave a clear, profound message. Every talk that he gave just told me that I needed to work harder to be a good person in one way or another. He truly lived the words "come what may and love it." He will be missed by many, but I am sure as he is reunited with his creator and his sweet wife, he is saying the words, "come what may, I'll love it."

Thanksgiving Day

The kids are spending Thanksgiving this year with their Mom. Other than missing them and wishing they were with me, this has to be one of the best Thanksgiving Days I can remember. I went to the gym this morning (they were open until 2PM) and worked out for a couple of hours. Afterwards, I sort of ditched out on my family for quite a few hours. I did eventually meet up with all of them and it was great to eat, laugh, and just spend time with them. I have wanted to do something for several years, and since I didn't have the kids, figured this was the year to do it. It was such an amazing experience and one I hope to repeat in the future. I have gained a whole new perspective on the words "blessed," "thankful," "fortunate," and "love" (as in seeing all as your brother or sister). I am so blessed in every way, and I am so thankful. I was telling a friend how odd I think it is (in a joking way), that we show how thankful we are by having a smorgasbord of food and pigging out. As I then explained, everyone knows that Thanksgiving is not REALLY about the food, the food is just an excuse. It is about getting together with those we love and care about. It is about enjoying each other's company. It is a special time in which we stop all the hustling that the world requires to re-center ourselves on what is truly important. The concept of this Holiday is so great. We stop for a time to realize our blessings and to spend time with loved ones. I think the pilgrims and Indians were truly inspired.

What is Thankful? From Where does it Come?

Thankful is not complaining about the food that has been placed before us.

Instead it is in realizing that we have food to eat. That the food we have been given gives us the nutrition we need, and allows us to accomplish all that we must do.

Thankful does not come from wanting a bigger home.
Instead, thankfulness comes in realizing that no matter how humble, we have a roof over our heads. We have shelter from the heat and cold. We have a place for our family to gather and be safe from the storms.

Thankful does not come from grudgingly going to work.
Instead, it comes in our gratitude for our employment and employer. It comes from being grateful to put the skills we have been blessed with to good use. A thankful person can see the challenges facing so many today and be grateful that they are not in that situation.

Thankful is not wishing we had enough money for what we want.
Instead it is in being grateful that we have enough money for what we need. It is in realizing that if we have all that we need and then two pennies more, we are indeed rich. It comes from remembering that far too many in the world would love to have their needs met.

Thankful is not whining about all the problems in our country.
Instead it is in knowing we have a voice and we have freedom. It comes in knowing that freedom is not always free. It comes from gratitude for the men and women who have fought and died for us to maintain our freedom through all generations. It comes in being able to stand up when we do not agree. It comes in knowing that each individual can make a difference. Most of all, it comes from knowing that while far from perfect, we still live in the greatest country in the world.

Thankful does not come from getting upset when our children misbehave.
Instead it is realizing that we have the blessing of being the most important people in the life of a child. It comes from knowing we have the ability to shape them into something great. We can be a light and an example that can shine in them and through generations to come.

Thankful does not come from wanting what others have.
Instead, thankful comes from wanting what we have. It comes from taking time to realize our blessings and realizing all we have been given. It comes in realizing these gifts and knowing that the Lord blessed us each individually with what we really need most. We can never be thankful by focusing on the blessings of others, for then we will have no time left to see our own blessings.

A thankful person does not say, “I am thankful, but….”
A thankful person shows the ways in which they are thankful. They are not looking for gaps in their blessings. They do not see the glass half empty, but see how full the glass is. To a thankful person, it goes way beyond whether the glass is half full or half empty. They not only see the glass half full, but can also see a space where more blessings are yet to come. This then makes them watchful and aware as individual blessings happen in their life.

Thankful does not come from looking down upon all we have been blessed with.
Thankfulness comes from looking up towards the Heavens in gratitude of all we have been given. It comes in knowing that we have a loving, caring Heavenly Father who knows us. It comes in realizing that he knows what is best for us, and is always mindful of our wants, desires, and especially our needs. Someone who is truly thankful even appreciates the challenges, hard times, and struggles. Thankful comes from realizing that the hard times only strengthen us. They also give us remembrance to help us to be more thankful for the good times. Thankful comes in taking all he gives unto us with a grateful heart. Finally, thankful comes in turning our hearts back to Him and always seeking His will.

I Am Not "Normal"

I know most of you are thinking......"GEE, YOU THINK!" Like you are in special ed and need me to explain something you already know. Instead of sharing all the ways in which you already know I am not normal, I will share a new one with you. When I do homework, I can't have it be completely quiet in the house. Most often I will sit on the couch, usually using my computer and I will have the TV on. I don't even pay attention to what is on, until something disturbing comes on and I think it might be a good idea to change the channel. So, me doing homework and not wanting it totally quiet already qualifies as "not normal." Let me go a step further, however. I was sitting there doing homework and Rachel Ray (I think that is her name) or somebody was on. Not a typical show I would watch if I ever had the chance. Suddenly I sort of heard that there were these women spending $12,000-18,000 on ONE outfit! Let me just say that both my truck and my car TOGETHER are not worth that. Many people's home furnishings are not worth that. That is like paying $1.4 Million for a car (.....the Bugatti Veyron, which even a car nut like me could never do,.........although I wouldn't mind driving it a few times). The deal was, they were going to force them to be frugal. I went back to what I was doing. They came out a little later, and guess what the "FRUGAL" price tag was for ONE outfit. $250 bucks. Who on earth is thinking that is frugal? Yep, definitely disturbing enough to change the channel....... You really want to be frugal?.......well do ya? It is called Target! If you really have a burning need to feel the frugality, head on over to the local D.I.! I just figure that it is like them saying, "okay, so the Bugatti was pretty expensive, so I traded it in for a nice, cheap, practical, Cadillac Escalade........with all the options. I guess I have never thought $250 was ever practical for ONE outfit. My suits MIGHT have cost that much. Granted, I am not the guy everyone comes to for fashion ideas (after all, I am straight), but I don't think I have many outfits that cost even $25. Especially when you consider I can mix and match. I have even gone shopping for women's dresses before (before everyone races each other to the comments section, NO, they weren't for me). I seem to have been able to find plenty of decent ones that do not even touch that realm. So, there you have it, another way in which I am not normal. I just wanted to help to firm up any case someone may be building against me. Let's leave trying to figure out why I always chew ice for another time. I am sure you have your theories.........I know, I know, it is a protein deficiency........ :)

Stake Conference

Today we had Stake Conference and got a new Stake Presidency. It was a really good meeting. The kids were VERY well behaved the whole time, especially considering that it is like two Sacrament Meetings right in a row. One of the speakers shared a really cool quote, I am totally going to mess it up, but it goes something like this:

"Everything you possess when you die will then belong to someone else, everything that you are will stay with you forever."

I thought that was a great quote, and a great reminder for me to work at what I would like to become. I guess it just puts so many things in to perspective. In my mind it is like everyone either chooses to be a slave, or chooses to be a master. If you focus on acquiring as many things as possible, you become a slave to working and paying for those things. If you focus on your beliefs, your family, friends, people, and worthwhile goals, you really become the master of your own destiny.

The other thing they talked about was praying not for what we want, but praying to understand and follow the will of the Lord. It is not like I have never heard that before. Sometimes in life, however, I think we just think we know what is best, and what we need. I learn over and over again (through the school of hard knocks) that what is best does not ever come by telling the Lord what we need, but by listening to him tell us what we need.

• Usually part of our Sunday dinner includes some sort of meat. It could be roast beef, steak, chicken, fish, ham, etc. We usually rotate through them again and again. Today it was just time for steak to come up again. At dinner A asked if we were having steak just because it was "Stake Conference." It is so funny how kids perceive things. They have finally understood the whole ward thing, and now they are slowly learning what a Stake is.
• Tonight T was saying the bedtime prayer. He always offers very thoughtful, sincere prayers. One of the things he was thankful for was that "all of the numbers come in the right order, like 1..2..3..4........10." I thought it was really cute. It just shows just how sincere a child's prayer really is.
• A was saying the dinner prayer today. She also has started to offer some sincere prayers. One of the things she said was, "we are so thankful that Jesus is going to come in eight years." I just wanted to let everyone know so they could prepare and mark their calendars!

Deep Thoughts, Shallow Brain, Part 17

They’ve Given All

Today I went to the home of two patients
whom I’ve visited so often before
I had been wondering how they were doing
when I was asked to go there once more

Two teen ladies claimed this home
they’ve been crippled and disabled from birth
I have been able to spend a lot of time there
and have seen their incredible worth

I would bring them medicine and supplies
to their make-shift hospital room
I would spend a few minutes with this family
my work would then always resume

I watched through the years as their parents
tenderly gave them such care
no matter what challenges they faced
Mom and Dad were always there

The room was not filled with all the latest toys
in fact I could never find one
but the home was filled with cheer and laughter
you know these girls had fun

I have often thought of this labor of love
they never uttered a word of complaint
through never ending days, all through the years
I am sure they must have felt faint

The great examples of dedicated parents
can clearly be observed
they show their children a pure, true love
when within their family they have served

So, in a somber mood I went back
to the home I’ve visited so oft
I gathered up all the unneeded equipment
and worked to keep my voice soft

This great set of parents have always done right
their Father’s will to accept
I sadly expressed my condolences at their loss
and they thanked me as we wept

We spoke quietly for a few minutes
they gently shared all that transpired
they now have one daughter in the hospital
for the other, time has expired

I thought of my great kids
the heartache of that situation
I then thought of selfless sacrifice
of devotion and dedication

People of the world tells us
we need to buy our kids this and that
this does not show love to our kids
but instead spoils them into a brat

In this selfish world it seems
a person is judged by all they possess
I must have been taught differently
because that has never defined a success

I feel I have been blessed to watch them
to witness all I was able to see
to see where I could be better as a parent
to be what I know I should be

Today I realized once again for myself
how much I do not give my two
I need to watch for all the little things
and show them all I‘m willing to do

An Alternative to Going Private

First of all, let me say that the blogging world needs to come up with some new terminologoy. "Going private" just sounds............naughty. Okay, it seems every time I open Google Reader to see everyone's happenings I read this phrase more and more often: "we are going private." One could argue that the reason everyone is going private is so that I won't read their blog.....hmmmm......come to think of it, I have only been invited to ONE blocked blog so far....hmmmm.....but, I digress. I just wanted to present an alternative to going private. Many who read my blog have noticed that I only use initials for the kids' names. I do not include too many details or specifics. Someone might be able to determine what state or even what county I live in, but it would be pretty hard to determine much else from reading what I have written. I do not forecast a lot of events that we may be doing in the future. People may understand some aspects of my job, but I don't share where I work. I show pictures from around my home, but do not give a broad picture of either the inside or outside. I certainly don't post pictures of my license plate or other really identifying information. I consider all of these to be only tiny little countermeasures however.

You want to know my real secret? I am going to give you such a good piece of advice, you should pay me for it! The reason people don't read my blog is because I am sooooo boring!!!! Yes, it's true, if only you all could make your blogs as boring as mine, no bad people (well, maybe just no people period) would ever WANT to read it! I mean if you combine my bad writing, poor grammar, lame poems, stupid thoughts, and ADD moments, it is amazing I even take the time to proofread back through it! The only interesting thing I have going for me are my kids. Now, I know this talent does not come naturally to any of you. What can I say? It is a gift. You all will just have to work to try to be more like me. You know, be less than you naturally are. In the end, maybe, just maybe it would be a better alternative than going private. What do you think? :)

Deep Thoughts, Shallow Brain Part 16

Some may look at us, to find where we have failed.
They look at our course and think for sure we’ve derailed.

Some may watch for things we’ve done wrong,
or choose to look down on us as we go along.

Some may look at all the setbacks we’ve faced,
or look at our lives, to think we’ve been disgraced.

Some may search for every negative they can find,
they look for the ways in which, we’ve fallen behind.

In reality, those people are all missing the boat,
these people do not have, a positive message to promote.

In this life we will see more than one setback,
we may have to work hard, to put our train on the track.

We may fall behind and have to catch up in a race,
we may work and struggle, just to find our place.

But in the end we’ve not failed, that is for sure,
as long as we get back up and we always endure.

Most people in life, who’ve had the greatest gain,
saw the storm clouds happen, but chose to dance in the rain.
.
For truly the only one who can never claim a win,
is the person who stayed down, when they’ve taken it on the chin.

So when you’re setbacks hit, and knock you to the ground,

make the choice to rise back up, and failure can't be found.

WHOA Bambi!

Nope, I am not referring to the name of my last blind date, although that might have been a fitting name for her......hmmm. Anyway, I was driving to Spring City tonight for work. All of the sudden "Bambi" darted right out in front of my van. I skidded around it, barely missing it by a couple of feet. This, along with a couple of other near misses over the years, got me thinking. Within the last couple of weeks I watched "Bambi" with my kids. Anyone who has seen it recently, probably remembers Bambi getting a really good chastizing by his Mother for dashing out into the meadow. I am thinking his Mother may have missed something much more important in rearing the young deer. I don't know Mom, you think it might have been a good idea to also tell Bambi to STAY OFF OF THE FREAKING ROAD??!!!! ESPECIALLY WHEN CARS ARE GOING BY AT 70 MPH???!!!! Obviously I am at least a better parent then she was. I tell my kids to stay out of the road all the time!

Winterish Rain

Cool: I have decided that I am not a big winter person. I like to look at the four seasons, and I like some of the scenery they bring, but mostly enjoy summer, spring, and fall (in that order) more than Winter. After a few times of sledding with the kids I am ready for June to come again. I start to have visions of taking the boat out again, going on walks, riding bikes, playing at the park, etc. There is one thing I do love about that first hard rain/snow fall. For some reason I think the fresh white snow blanketing the mountains is beautiful. I had to take this picture (with my camera phone) while I was in the Logan area today.

Not Cool: Driving only 50 MPH on the freeway in heavy rain early this morning. Even at that speed most cars (mine included) were suddenly doing some major hydroplaning. This instantly sent the traction control system on my car into a conniption fit to keep the car safely on the road. (Although I titled this not cool, I have to admit I do think it is cool how this system actually works, and that it does help to keep things in control).

Just so no one thinks I am a bad citizen, yes I voted today. I want to thank all of you early voters who may or may not have stood in line to vote. I left school a little early and voted before work today. I was there at 11AM and did not have to wait even one second!

Struggling

People sometimes ask how I can be so happy all the time. Well today I am going to burst their bubble. I am here to tell you that I have plenty of struggles and inner turmoil. Lately I have just felt like I am getting knocked down a lot. I feel as though I am being assaulted on several fronts. Life has seemed to hit hard, and I have found it harder and harder to stand back up. The worst part is that with each passing day, it seems more and more challenges seem to come. I often feel as though it will never get better. I know you are probably thinking, "who on earth would ever put this on a blog?!!!" Why, you ask, am I choosing to share all of this for anyone with an internet connection to read? It is a sincere effort to share hope to anyone facing similar struggles (as we all do). I don't consider anything that I have felt lately to be insignificant, however, I know others face so much more. At the beginning of each day we get to start over. As the old saying goes, "the sun will come out tomorrow." That does not mean that circumstances are different from the night before. One thing can be changed though, our outlook and our attitude. Sometimes I have taken advantage of that fresh start, other times it has been harder. I have had to work to shift my focus from the things that cause me pain and anguish to the things that create feelings of hope, sunlight, and peace. I HAVE BEEN BLESSED! There are certainly things that anyone could find lacking in my life, but there is no doubt in my mind that I have been blessed. Just to name a few: I have two amazing kids, an amazing family, food to eat, clothes to wear, a roof over my head, a knowledge of the gospel, a working body, employment, vast opportunities, and certainly not least, I have been associated with all of you in one way or another. Whether we are closer friends, who hang out occasionally, or whether your only contact with me is to read my blog occasionally, I just want to thank you. You have all in some way or another touched my life for the better. I am a better person because I have known you and I am grateful for every association whether long or brief, small or big. Your example only makes me want to shine for others and light the night when they are experiencing dark times. Finally, I have a friend who is my constant companion. He is there for me through anything, and He has actually felt all that I am feeling. There is no miracle cure for the pain that we sometimes feel. However, there is someone who can work miracles in our lives if we allow Him to. How can I get my head so buried in the sand? I have been given endless blessings. I know that no matter what I face today, it is not permanent. The sun WILL come out tomorrow, I just need to shift myself into a place where I am able to feel its warmth.

Deep Thoughts, Shallow Brain, Part 15

wealth, noun: the quality of profuse abundance.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because I own a big spacious home,
where every fixture is covered in chrome.
But I have a home of life, love and laughter,
memories for each of us throughout the hereafter.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because I drive the fanciest new car,
the shiny new paint without one tiny mar.
But it constantly gets me where I need to go,
through hot summer heat, or winter’s harsh snow.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because I have tons of money in the bank,
raising me up high on the Forbe's list in rank.
But we have food from the local grocery store,
we have all that we need and then plenty more.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because our clothes are the latest design,
our closets full, with every popular new line.
But we can get dressed for the weather each day,
if we are going out to work or going out to play.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because my job gives me everything I want,
allowing me to do as I please and act nonchalant.
But I have work that keeps me busy and employed,
the experiences great and associations I’ve enjoyed.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because I hang with the most happening crowd,
being invited to the places, only select people are allowed.
But while I may have few friends, I value every one,
when it comes to the heart, they can’t be outdone.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because I have skills of an incredible athlete,
with throngs of people worshipping me at every meet.
But my mind and body function, in the ways that they should,
giving me the choice to use them for bad or for good.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because I’m famous and all see my name,
lit up on some marquee, showing the world my fame.
But I have people who like me the way that I am,
I'm not required to take, the world's exam.

I AM WEALTHY
Not because I possess some vast amount of gold,
my name filled on A-lists of celebrities untold.
But I have been blessed, my needs have been fulfilled,
I’m grateful for all I have, and I choose the life I build.

So many still don’t get, that it’s not just about the stuff,
if your focus is on those things, you’ll never have enough.

I slowly have seen all that REALLY gives one wealth:
a loving family, a life of service, or the blessing of good health.

How amazingly rich, we would realize ourselves to be,
if we seek what’s most important, for all of us to see.

HOW WEALTHY ARE YOU?